Ah, How Romantic

Some people have their favorite romantic line from a movie or novel.

Don't get me wrong. I have those too.
(Mr. Darcy, anyone?!)

The classic romantic line is usually poetic. Or it gives off the vibe of: baby, I love you. I'll do anything for you. I'll be here for you forever. And ever. I can't live without you. You inspire me. You complete me. I neeeeeed you.

You know, stuff like that.

Well, I've always been a hopeful (and sometimes...hopeless) romantic.

I'm not waiting for my date to start rattling off poetry to me or to take me for a long walk on the beach and inform me how my lovely eyes sparkle and glisten by the moonlight.

Reality is often more romantic than fiction. Why? Because reality is tangible. It leaves room for possibilties, while fiction shuts out the possibilities. A lot of people initially think it's the other way around, but no. It's not.

I've only really noticed this recently...

my engaged friend shared with me something that has now become the most romantic moment I've ever heard of.

This friend went through a lot of adversity in life and has worked incredibly hard to reach the point where she is. Without getting into too much detail, I'd say her challenging situations are not the typical challenges that a young frum girl in her early 20s has experienced.
She has worked tremendously on her middot and religious observance (that includes chessed, modesty, etc.), and she is one of the most amazing people I know.

While she was dating her husband-to-be, she knew that she had to open up and share her difficulties and life experience with him. She was very nervous because she wasn't sure how he would react or handle the information. But clearly, the information had to be conveyed to him because it's integral. If he wouldn't be understanding, their relationship would have to come to an end.

It was a winter night; dark and chilly outside. They were both sitting in his car, having a deep discussion.
This is your opportunity. You have to tell him.
And so she did.
After she shared her situation with him, she looked down. She was embarrassed; she felt tears forming in her eyes because of the painful experiences she had. She was unsure what he was thinking and nervous about his response. As she stared at the car carpet, she fidgeted around with her hands, locking and unlocking her fingers.
Before he could respond, she quietly said "I need somebody who will appreciate my struggles."

Within seconds, he looked straight at her, and with a tone of sincere disbelief said "you really think you wouldn't?"

She felt a huge sigh of relief. She had found him. Her zivug.

Those 5 words he said to her made all of the difference. He was amazed that she could even doubt that a person as beautiful and strong as herself could ever doubt that she wouldn't find somebody who would appreciate her.

For me, that was the most romantic moment I've ever heard of.
Picture the following:
here's this girl...so insecure with her history and difficulties that she has to deal with daily. She's dating for quite some time, praying and hoping for her zivug daily. Thoughts like "will I ever get married? Who will overlook my background? Who in his right mind will want to marry me?" cross her mind.
Finally, she meets a wonderful guy who posesses all of the traits she needs.
But she needs to take the relationship a step further and let him know who she really is.
So, she opens up to this guy whom she admires so much and wants to get married to and build a holy home with. However, she's nervous that she might scare him away. After she musters the strength to open up, and while shyly and insecurely looking down at her feet while almost about to cry, she's sure that he would respond harshly. She imagines the worst-case-scenario.
And then...
He tells her that he is shocked someone as amazing as she would ever dare think that she wouldn't find somebody who is sensitive and appreciative of her life. He's someone who can say "wow, this girl is so incredible. It's BECAUSE of her struggles that she was able to build herself up. It's not that she's incredible DESPITE the struggles. She used her problems as stepping stones...not stumbling blocks."

She found him. He's the perfect guy for her; he sincerely appreciates her.

Advice for all of the single folks: find somebody who appreciates and understands your struggles.
I once read that you know you've met somebody special when you open up and tell them something that you rarely share with anybody, and yet...that person doesn't run away.

Reality is way more beautiful than fantasy.

Sappy love quote of the day

I found this in my 2007 records...

"Love is like a country you travel across. You reach Love country, and as you travel, you get deeper in love."

"You've bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you."

(10 virtual chocolate chip cookies if you can guess where the title line is from.)

I'm a fan of period dramas, most of which are based on books.
(My favorites are Washington Square, Jane Eyre, North & South, and Pride & Prejudice.)
I don't remember precisely when my appreciation for these dramas began. Ever since my early teenage years, I delved into the realm of thoughts; life, existence, purpose, and of course, my admiration of truly meaningful relationships. In particular, I remember enjoying these period-dramas during my late high school years. High school was enough of a drag, and I often tuned it out by creating my own exclusive emotional paradise.

What can I say? I'm a hopeless (hopeful?) romantic till the end.

Jane Austen is commonly the most famous of the period-drama authors. All of her storylines, as well as many of the others, often share similar themes:
1) opposites attract
2) first impressions and stereotypes are often misjudgments; there's more to a person than what meets the eye.

The poor gal with the rich guy. The smart, chutzpahdik fair maiden with the proper mannered fellow. The rude, conceited guy who turns out to have many layers to him -- and is in fact a kind-hearted and sensitive individual. The plain-looking gal with the ravishing, wealthy dude.
Those who were at first repulsed by each other eventually become head-over-heels in love, not because of their physical attributes, family, or fortune, rather because of their virtues and morals.

One of my favorite dialogues in Pride and Prejudice:Mr. Darcy: Miss Elizabeth. I have struggled in vain, and I can bear it no longer. These past months have been a torment. I came to Rosings with the single object of seeing you...I had to see you. I have fought against my better judgment, my family's expectations, the inferiority of your birth by rank and circumstance. All these things I am willing to put aside and ask you to end my agony.
Elizabeth: I don't understand.
Mr. Darcy: I love you. Most ardently. Please do me the honor of accepting my hand.
Elizabeth: Sir, I appreciate the struggle you have been through, and I am very sorry to have caused you pain. Believe me, it was unconsciously done.
Mr. Darcy: Is this your reply?
Elizabeth: Yes, sir.
Mr. Darcy: Are you...are you laughing at me?
Elizabeth: No.
Mr. Darcy: Are you rejecting me?
Elizabeth: I'm sure that the feelings which, as you've told me have hindered your regard, will help you in overcoming it.
Mr. Darcy: Might I ask why, with so little endeavor at civility, I am thus repulsed?
Elizabeth: And I might as well enquire why, with so evident a design of insulting me, you chose to tell me that you liked me against your better judgment.

Do they get married and experience true love in the end?

It might be the storyline, the characters, the raw emotions, the professions of love, the beautiful scenery, or a combination of all the above that hooks me and leads me to wonder...
perhaps misjudgements are often prematurely made in life, especially when it comes to dating. Do people always deserve a second chance? Or do these stories only exist in fantasy, period-drama-novel-movie land?