Many people can relate to the concept of having an all loving Father in Heaven.
I did (and do), but my belief that HaShem is my loving Father Who only wants the best for me has been significantly strengthened since I became a mother BH.
There're so many different instances when one of my kids is crying cause he just doesn't understand what's going on. He thinks I'm hurting him but really I'm helping him. For example, vaccines. No parent likes taking their child to the doctor in order to get a shot. But this shot, however painful it may be, is preventing way more painful and dangerous diseases. So this preventive measure needs to be taken (and btw, according to Rav Elyashiv z"l and many other Rabbanim, it is a mitzvah and chiyuv to vaccinate your children).
So my baby cries when that sharp needle goes into her soft, delicate little leg. It hurts me so much, and I just wish I could take the pain for her. But I can't. This is what needs to be done. It's for her own good. But I can't explain it to her. I mean, I can. But she wouldn't understand. When she's older BH, I'll be able to explain it to her. But for now - an explanation wouldn't do any good.
That's how it is with HaShem. He's our parent Who loves us so much. But we need to sometimes go through pain, yisurim, difficulties, in order to prevent a bigger problem later on. It is HaShem saving us and doing something for our own good, but we just don't understand. We don't see how this could be for our benefit if it hurts so much. An explanation wouldn't be able to justify the pain because we are too "young" and not capable of understanding. Perhaps when we're older (hindsight is often 20/20, right?) but not at this moment.
Every time I take one of my kids to receive a shot/vaccination, I remind myself of this.
And I've seen this happen to me so many times. BH I have been zocha to see how many yisurim I went through were for my benefit, making me stronger & wiser and often saved me from ruining my life.
For example, back when I was in shidduchim (as anyone who followed my blog from the beginning knows), I suffered immensely from the first ever close relationship that I was in. I was dating someone who, for years, I hoped to be married to. I allowed myself to be vulnerable and completely trusted him, thinking that he would definitely be my husband. Well, after he suddenly & unexpectedly ended it, I was just miserable. I felt as if someone cut open my bleeding heart and threw it on the floor in front of me. There were many days where I couldn't stop crying. Why wasn't I good enough?
I felt as if I would never find better. And in fact, the more I dated, the more I realized how nobody "measured up" to him. Was I doomed forever? Would I ever find somebody with whom I'll have such an emotional and close relationship?
I can't even begin to put it in words how wrong I was to be sad after he broke up with me. Other than becoming frum, up until that point, it was the biggest bracha HaShem ever blessed me with. If I would've been married to him, my life would've been miserable. I will not go into detail because one day he, or a relative, may find this blog, and it would make them feel bad. But I know HaShem saved me because I fully believe, with 100% honesty, that I would have never, ever been happy with that man.
My husband, baruch HaShem, is better than any person I could've ever dreamed of. I am so thankful to HaShem that I had to go through those years of painful shidduchim to find my other half and best friend. It was all worth it.
I am not blogging about this in order brag. I am sharing this to show everyone that although we may be suffering and going through such nisyonot, it really is for THE GOOD, and if we just hang in there, daven, and work on ourselves, things will really start looking up. Keep your head up and have emuna! Gam Zu L'tova is not just a phrase. It's not just a played out, nice sounding concept. It is absolute emet, and one must believe with his whole heart and neshama that HaShem loves every single Jew, and there is not one speck of cruelty in HaShem. He does everything for us out of love and care, hoping for us to be close to Him and make the right choices to lead wonderful and meaningful lives.